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Wednesday, April 20, 2005

drowning without you. come back & save me.

oh shit! i'm feeling super guilty now but what can i do? too late for regrets. done what i'm not supposed to do. i've changed since you left. that's a fact, not an opinion. becoming a total bitch at heart. here i go blaming others again. guess the chalet was too much for me, us not acknowledging each other's presence. i died that night.

i wish i could blame God for all this. for taking you away from me but i guess it is my own fault since there is free will. if i was prettier, bitcher, nicer or funnier, you would be by my side now. i've been praying but somehow i don't believe prayers work anymore but i still pray cos it gives me hope. i want to stop going to church but then it just doesn't seem right. if this is life with God, i think it is going to be worst without him. but i think i am losing my faith. i need God to show me a miracle. waiting for it :)

now all i want to do is waste my life away.

OMG. and they are playing heaven by dj sammy right now. we used to hear this song almost everytime i was at your house. sigh. "just hold me now cause our love wil light the way. baby you're all that i need and i found it there in your heart .."


i woke up this morning feeling lonely
there's so much my heart just does not understand
there were times nothing really mattered
now i find i care to much
there's life in everything i touch

look at what love has done to me
i'm not who i used to be
everything is changing
and i will never be the same
look at what love has done to us
when will we ever learn to trust
we're running out of time, so little time baby
look at what love has done to me

now it's late at night i'm here without you
trying to make my way to where you are
can't you see i'll still be here waiting
can't you see our two hearts were always
meant to be as one

look at what love done to us
when will we ever learn to trust
we're running out of time, there's so little time
look at what love has done to me
calling out your name
look at what love has done to us
running out of time

baby look at what love has done to me
i'm running out of time, so much.

look what love has done.
patti smith

-praying

[ 3:17 PM ]

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